A Mother’s Cry
Angie looked angrily at her daughter, Emma; she was tired of having this episode every day. It’s always been one fight or the other and it all about the same thing, her way of life; drinking, addiction, late night clubbing and so on.
“Alright, I am tired of arguing with you Emma; you are not living this house at this time of the night.” Angie reaffirmed her decision.
“Why?” Emma shouted back in fury.
“Because a girl of your age shouldn’t be going out by this time of the night.” She shouted back in anger.
“You can’t control my life mum and you cannot keep telling me what to do every seconds of my life.” Emma raged out.
“This is not a role playing or whatever you may think. I am your mother and right now I am in the position of telling you what’s not and what to do.”
“Being my mother is not a licence to control me; I am grown up now, and I can make my own decisions.” she yelled back at her.
“You are fifteen for crying out loud; your mates are sleeping by this time not planning to go out. Girls your age go to school and come right back home, not stays out for days. You call the police or social worker at every slightest scolding but now, listen and listen carefully; as long as I , your mother lives, I will fight so hard to have you come back home, to where you belong. You can fight me as much as you want but I will fight on my knees in prayer.” She looked straight into her eyes.
“Honestly mum, you talk too much; every day, every minute, you just go on blabbing and chatting.” Emma said and walked out of the house.
Angie felt a sharp pain in her head, tired and exhausted; tried all she knows she could to help her wayward child but nothing seems to help. Her shouting, anger and talks have not yielded any result. She had blamed herself several times at the way her daughter had turned.
Once upon a time, she lived a reckless life years ago, and her bad influence had rubbed on her daughter. Angie had her baby in her teens and continued a promiscuous life; parties at odd time of the night. She was into all sorts of drugs, smoking and drinking. She had no regards to life and allowed her daughter watch every step of her life until three years ago when she met with Christ and that changed everything. She changed from her old ways and embraced the new life in Christ. Since then, she’s been trying to bring her daughter into the new life of God.
Her fifteen years old girl is out of control; smoking, drinking and living a wasteful life; different piercing all over her body.
There was a time they were both involved in a heated argument that resulted in her slapping her daughter; half an hour later, Emma came back with a social worker and the police accusing her of abuse. Angie didn’t see her daughter for almost a month and then, one day; she was back at her front door and apologized to her and promised to listen and behave herself. Her promise didn’t last a week, and was back where she started from.
Angie sat there, staring at the door; she wanted her daughter to have the same kind of peace and joy she did found in Christ and every day since the past three years, she’s been praying and crying out to the Lord to restore and bring her daughter home.
A few hours later, Emma was with her gang of friends partying when a fight broke out between two rival gangs; there was chaos everywhere as everyone was fighting, using every weapon available on one another. Before long, they heard the police siren when everyone who could still walk began to run. She fled away from there with others, but they could hear the police behind them. Just then, some of her friends whom they were running together began to shoot at the police, and the police had no choice than to defend themselves. Exchanges of shot of fire were everywhere; confusion and fear gripped her.
She had no idea where she was but began to run until she found a small spot where she could hide. She was trembling all over and flooded in tears. She was scared the police were probably after her and was more afraid of being shot at. Just then, like a twinkling of an eye, she found herself in an unfamiliar place; the surrounding wasn’t like any she did see before, it was a long stretch road.
She couldn’t see the end of it and not even the beginning, she was standing in the middle of the road alone and frightened. Suddenly, she heard a voicebehind her but there was no one there.
“There’s a way that seems right to a man but the end is destruction.” The voice said.
“What!” she jolts. “Who said that?”
“Why have you been obstinate and so wish to destroy your own life?” the voice asked.
“Who are you? Where am I?” she asked, trembling and confused.
“I am the angel your mother assigned to you” the angel said, appearing to her.
She gasped as she saw the cloud-like man standing before her.
“You know my mother…, where is she?” she whimpers.
“She is where she’s always been, praying for you.”
“Please, where am I? Show me the way back home.” she said in tears.
“The decision to go back home depends on you; you have to make that choice.” The
“I want to go back home.” she said but suddenly the angel was gone.
She looked all around her, but he was nowhere to be found.
“Where are you? Please come back.” she cried out, shivering all over. She began to move forward but noticed her feet were heavy on the ground. On her ankle was long steel chain pulling her back. She dragged her foot with difficulty to take each step. Several minutes later, she was in pain, exhausted and tired and going nowhere. She knelt down in tears.
“Please help me…, please…” she cried out. “I can’t go on all by myself; I need you.” She said in tears. Seconds later, the angel returned standing right in front of her.
“Oh thank you, you came back. Please help me, I want to go home.” She pleaded.
“As I said to you before, the decision lies in your hands; you have to decide.” He said strongly to her.
“How?” she asked, confused. She didn’t know where she was or what direction to turn.
“You have to go back to your source, your maker; He only can guide your step back home.”
“I don’t understand” she said, confused.
“God is your maker; he is your Source and only He can guide you back.” He looked into her eyes.
“Yes, God!” he smileD.
“I don’t think he can help me. I am not someone he can help.”
“Why do you say that?”
“It’s only good people that he can help, and I’m not it. I live a terrible life. In my short life, I have done so many horrible things. At one time I have aborted a baby, battered my body with so many things, stolen, I have hit my mother and so many bad things, how can God help me?”
“It is not the good the Lord came for; its people like you who think they can’t get redemption from their sins. It’s people like you he refines and redeemed, giving you a new life.”
Emma straightened to listen more to him. Every word struck her.
“But how can He?”
“You have to confess your sins before Him. You are his most wonderful creature. He will wash you, cleanse you and make you whole; your sins he will remember no more, your shame He will take away.”
Tears flowed from her eyes as he spoke those words to her. Knowing that there is someone willing to look past every imperfection, weakness and sins and still wants to take you in.
“He can hear you Emma, talk to him.” the angel said and went away.
Emma sat there in tears; the angel was gone but she felt another presence, a kind of feeling she couldn’t explain.
“Oh God! Help me please…” she cried out. “I have gone my own way, but I am coming
back to you…, please forgive my sins, forgive me of every wrong and things I have done
in my life….” She broke down into more tears. She felt alone and scared.
Just then, a bright shining light filled the spot she was kneeling; it filled the space and brought her to her feet; her ground was firm; the chains were broken away from her ankle. The light was radiant, magnificent. She stood in awe of his presence; she saw something like a face but was clothed in light, a pure light. Instantly, she fell on her knees; she couldn’t behold his face. It was filled with holiness, righteousness, awesomeness. The splendour and beauty were beyond comprehension. She whimpers in His presence until she heard his voice.
“I have heard your cry, I heard your voice my child, everything you have said is right here before him” He said in a powerful and yet soothing voice.
“I will have mercy on you and will wipe your tears. I will forgive you and remember your sins no more. I will yet clothe you in love and wash you in mercy. I have always loved you, and I will still love you. My Son, Jesus Christ has cried before me on your behalf and has used his blood in exchange for your life.” He said in the most beautiful voice.
She stood there in the wonder of His presence; she felt clothed in mercy, love and forgiveness. Every word he spoke was illuminating to her. It was a kind of feeling you could never comprehend. She felt herself in His embrace and knew beyond words that his love for her is limitless.
Seconds later, she was back at the same spot where she had been hiding; everywhere was quiet. She sat there in tears but this time; the tears were of gratitude. She knew she had just met with the Lord, and his love filled her heart. She came out of her hiding and did the short walk back home. Still soaked in tears, she gently knocked the door to her house since she lost her keys in the whole commotion.
Angie jolted from the couch where she had fallen asleep when she heard the knock; she stood up and went to open it.
Emma couldn’t contain herself; she ran into her mother’s arms and wept.
“I met with Him mum; I met with Him,” she said in tears. “He is so awesome, powerful…, Oh Mum; I wish you could have met with him…”
“What!” Angie said, confused.
“Oh mum, everything wasn’t right until I met with him; His light filled my heart, this peace, I don’t understand it.”
Angie watched her daughter in tears, talking more about her encounter and without doubt; she knew her daughter had met with the Lord. She broke down in tears of Joy and held her so tight in her embrace. ‘The Lord has done a great thing, Bless His only name.’
She listened in tears as Emma went on about her encounter; she told her about the peace she felt in her heart despite all anger and fear she had been feeling all of her life, she wanted more of this and asked her mother to tell her more about the Lord she met.
It’s been almost two months since Emma gave her life to Christ; the journey has been a fruitful one although there were days when she had to struggle with her addictions and past but has learnt to depend more on God. Separating from her gang was the hardest she did but taking each step one at a time, she’s distanced herself from her old life.
She returned back to school and currently preparing for her GSCE exams and planned to go to college.
Angie has been overjoyed to see the changes in her daughter; she tried not to push her too hard but continued to encourage her in the way of the Lord and never for once stopped
praying for her. She realised from this experience that sometimes what we want might take a while to come to us but with persistence in prayer, God can do all things. Praying for our kids should be a vital part of our lives, no matter how far or deep they are in sin, God can still restore anyone and He will bring every situation to his glory.
Pray for the salvation of your children; pray they grow in the grace and knowledge of our Lord and saviour; that integrity and honesty be their virtue and their protection; they should be alert and self-controlled in all they do; they should grow to find the word of God more precious than much pure gold and sweeter than honey from the comb. Pray for deliverance from bad habit, pray for their salvation and dedication back to the presence of God. Don’t give up, God does answers prayers.
Our family is a Circle of Love and strength. With every birth and every union, the circle grows. Every joy shared adds more love. Every obstacle faced together makes the circle stronger. Edu.
Let your family and union be built on the solid love of God and surround your family in a Circle of Love. Be loved and continually be IN-love. God is love. – Abimbola CirclesOfLove
© Circlesoflove 2017
Photo credit: Guildposts
Habits are life’s killers; they eat you slowly until it completely devours every part of you. A lot of us have struggled daily to break away from some form of habits in our lives; while others have given up ever breaking free from them.
Habits and addiction are not just the big names like sexual sins, alcohol and drugs in take. Habits could also be in form of anger or even lying.
Habits are routines of behavior that are repeated regularly, which tend to be difficult to give up. We all know the little and big things we are trying to break away from our lives; the addiction that has become a scorn on your flesh. We find do ourselves doing the very thing we do not want to do.
Let me quickly show you something I read from the bible. First, you have to know that every scripture in the bible is inspired by God and is useful to teach us what is true and to make us realize what is wrong in our lives. It corrects us when we are wrong and teaches us to do what is right. 2 Timothy 3:16.
Paul said in Romans 7: 18:20. For I have the desire to do what is good, but I cannot carry it out. For I do not do the good I want to do, but the evil I do not want to do—this I keep on doing. Now if I do what I do not want to do, it is no longer I who do it, but it is sin living in me that does it.
In order to break free from any form of addiction or habit; we have to break free from the flesh. The flesh has nothing good for us, except to be subjected under it. The Flesh tells us its okay to do that, ‘just a little wouldn’t hurt’, it reminds you of your past and the inability to live above that. It tells you ‘everyone is doing it, even so called born-again Christian are also struggling with you, so what makes you think you can live as perfect as you want to’. It’s tells you of your weaknesses and how difficult it is to break free.
You feel a war going on inside of you; even though you desire to do the right thing, to walk in obedience to God’s word; yet, there is constant disagreement in your body. For in my inner being I delight in God’s law; but I see another law at work in me, waging war against the law of my mind and making me a prisoner of the law of sin at work within me. What a wretched man I am! Who will rescue me from this body that is subject to death? Romans 7:22-24.
Now Folks, the first sign of defeat is thinking you cannot break free from every habit or addiction in your life. If you are a born-again Christian, remember that, there is now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus, because through Christ Jesus the law of the Spirit who gives life has set you free from the law of sin and death. Romans 8:1-2.
Now, the question comes’ how do I break free from every habit and addiction in my life? The word of Romans 12 comes to mind: Therefore, I urge you, brothers and sisters, in view of God’s mercy, to offer your bodies as a living sacrifice, holy and pleasing to God—this is your true and proper worship. Do not conform to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind.
Listen folks, your body is the temple of God and should not be subjected under sin. The other day when I was reading this verse, then it struck me; how do I present my body as a ‘living sacrifice’ to God? I know my body is the temple of God, but what does it mean to offer it to God as a sacrifice? Then, the Holy Spirit explained it to me this way. During the old days in the bible; the Israelites would always offer animal sacrifices to God in various form; to appreciate His goodness in their lives, for forgiveness of sins, for deliverance and so on. But yet, God expect us to offer our own bodies as sacrifices to him, and yet living.
Now for me to offer my body to God as a living sacrifice; I have to lay down my flesh, surrender my body, lay it all down before him; not just that, then ask in total surrender that his fire which is the Holy Spirit comes down to accept my body before the Lord.
Now please, bear with me here, I’m going somewhere. The fire of God is one, but with different functions: it consumes, it burns, it destroys, rekindles, refresh, repairs and can also be as tongues of fire as it did on the day of Pentecost.
When you lay your life as a living sacrifice before God; His fire will come down to consume every impurity, every habit, addiction or every marks that the enemy has placed upon your life. The same fire will then rekindle, repair and restores your life back to the ordinary plan of God.
However, this is not just a time thing; that is why Romans 12: 2 says, ‘do not be conform any longer to the pattern of this world, but be transform by the renewing of your mind. You have to constantly stay in the presence of God; you have to daily remain on the alter of God. You cannot keep walking in the pattern of this world; behaving in an ungodly manner and expecting not to fall into sin, is only a deception of the enemy. You cannot still go back to the places that have led you to sin and wants to stay free from the addiction; you cannot take a sneak peak at those things or dial the numbers that you know led you to some pattern of lives you want to stay away from.
Also Leviticus 6: 13 says, ‘Fire shall be kept burning continually on the altar; it is not to go out.’ You have to constantly, continuously stay in the presence of God. The fire has to keep burning. Renew your mind daily with the word of God; study and dwell in the presence of God so that you can know his perfect Will for you. God told Moses in Leviticus 6: 8, that the burnt offering must remain on the altar; in other words, you have to remain in the presence of God, you have to always and still offer your body as a living sacrifice to him; not just today or for some hours, but every day of your life.
Remember, shall we continue in sin and allow grace to abound? By no means!
In the same way, count yourselves dead to sin but alive to God in Christ Jesus. Therefore do not let sin reign in your mortal body so that you obey its evil desires. Do not offer any part of yourself to sin as an instrument of wickedness, but rather offer yourselves to God as those who have been brought from death to life; and offer every part of yourself to him as an instrument of righteousness. For sin shall no longer be your master, because you are not under the law, but under grace. Romans 6:11-14.
I pray for the grace and power to break free from every habits and addictions in our lives; the willingness to submit totally to God’s will.
© Circlesoflove 2017
Happy Mothers Day
Happy Mothers Day to every beautiful woman out there. May your days be filled with joy and happiness.
The Guilt In Me
Annette screamed out as pain and anguish filled her; the excruciating pain in her heart is just too much bear. “Oh God….” She whimpered. “I did it all; I caused it….” She cried out. “I allowed all these to happen……, I put all these on myself….” She crouched to her knees in tears.
“I did not even protect her, I could not…….” She held her chest in pain.
She had just committed her fourth abortion amongst others. It’s been two days since she went through the horrific experience, but the darkness and bitterness in her heart were unbearable.
The image that comes to her each time she closes her eyes has eluded her from sleeping for days now. The voices in her head and flashing images have been tormenting her.
“I was so selfish, all I cared about is myself; I have destroyed lives, I have destroyed people all for the sake of my own gain; I have destroyed homes…….” her hands and knees trembling so fast that they could not hold her still. “God! What have I done to myself……., who am I?” she screamed out.
All her life has been one setback to another, living a reckless life; Annette has done so much abominable to her body; given her body in exchange for money and every other material thing; gone through abortion so many times, luring men out of their homes into her seductive bed. She’s turned women into single parents just because their men have been sold out to her and made children fatherless. All these have been done in total contempt to life.
Now, she felt her life was over, she sees all the evil she’s done right in front of her and all her sins and evil are all before her. The pain, hurt, agony, wickedness, selfishness; every evil she’s done are all labelled all over her. She trembled on the floor, shaking in fear; the guilt was unbearable; she knew what she has to do now.
She has to pay for her sins, the thick darkness all around her was overwhelming, an indication of her evil deeds. Then, she felt herself getting up from the floor and walking towards a long corridor; every step carried in shame and scorn. On her body were written all the wickedness and things she did to herself and others, she just couldn’t get away from them, no matter how she shook her body, they had become part of her. She could see them written plainly on her. That was it! The guilt became her torment.
Her eyes filled with tears; she had not always been like this, everything she did was not what she had imagined her life to be. She never thought she would sell her body all in the name of pleasure, enjoyment and money; she never once considered she would abort any baby in her life term, let alone several pregnancies. She never imagined what she would do to families after having the best parents in her life, those who loved her unconditionally and stayed together in love. She knew what love is and yet deprived some families of having this.
As she walked towards the door, she knew she has to pay for all these; her sins were all plain to her. Few meters away, she saw the door and written on it is, ‘Door of Condemnation, Guilt and Destruction’. She knew that door was meant for her, her sins have condemned her, her guilt was all over her and she is meant for destruction. Her eyes were fixed on the door as the tears streams down her face.
Just then, she saw a man standing not too far away from the door; at first, she tried to ignore him and still focus on the door but you just can’t ignore him. He had the most beautiful face she has never seen. His figure is like that of a man, from his waist up he looked like glowing metal, as if full of fire and from there down he looked like fire, and brilliant light surrounding him like the appearance of a rainbow in the clouds. She stood still, unable to beyond his face. She felt breathless; again, her feet were failing her as they started to tremble, she leant against the wall at her right side as she shivered in fear.
The darkness all around her was fading, the illuminating light from the man was overcoming the whole place. She felt as if the whole place was shaking; she couldn’t understand how a presence of a one man could do all these. His light illuminated the whole place.
Suddenly, the whole place became calm and right in front of her was the man. He was filled with holiness and beauty beyond words.
“I have to go through that door…” she whimpered. “I can’t stand being here with you….” She cried, afraid to look at him.
“Why?” His voice was so gentle and calm.
Her head was still bowed. “Because I am wicked……, can’t you see me? I am destined to that door……” She was afraid to look up at him but the hollow in his hands caught her attention.
He noticed her intense gaze on his hands. “I did this for you…” He said to her.
“Me!” she gasped. “How? Why?”
“I paid the price for all your sins; for every sins, shame and condemnation, I paid the price so you wouldn’t have to go through that door…” He pointed to the door.
Annette shook her head vigorously.
“No, you don’t understand; I am a terrible person; I have done so much evil and no one can save me.”
He smiled softly at her. “I am that I am; I am the God of mercy, I have given my life for all your sins so you don’t have to live in condemnation. I will forgive your sins and give you a renewed, restored life, a life without blemish….”
“But my sins are many….” She interrupted.
He lowered himself to her position and almost became the same height as she is. Their eyes met and this time she didn’t take her face away. She was awestruck. His face was pure, filled with kindness, love and holiness; she saw the greatness in him, yet his humility and love went before him.
He is God and yet speaks to a mere person like her.
“I have already paid for them all….” He said in the most assuring voice. “For God so loved the world that he gave his only begotten son that whosoever believe in Him should not perish but have everlasting life.”
That verse was familiar to her, she’s heard so many born-again Christian quotes that to her several times but she’s only laughed at them but today held a great importance to her.
“I have paid the price Annette, I gave my life for you….All you have to do is confess and repent of your sins. I love you.”
“Me…” she whimpered.
“Yes, you!” he smiled at her.
The truth of his words pierced into her; she felt safe and secured in his presence, she knew only Him can save her from all her sins. She broke down in tears and begged for mercy, she cried for his forgiveness of all her sins, to wash away every iniquity away from her. She confessed every wrong she’s done and continued to weep at his feet.
He picked her up from the floor and used his garment to wipe the tears streaming down her face. Then, he brought her into the most beautiful embrace and held her there.
Annette felt such overwhelming love and peace in his embrace. She felt anew, like a new born baby. She couldn’t believe this feeling; her sense of condemnation and guilt were all gone. She was covered in mercy, in peace that is beyond any human understanding. She felt beautiful from within to her outside. She couldn’t believe how that could be. It was a feeling of purity. It was unbelievable considering all that she had done. She closed her eyes tightly and held so tight on him. She couldn’t even explain these feelings in plain words. She was touched to her soul. She wanted to stay right there in his presence and ever let him go. In fact, she wanted to go with him wherever he went. She just wanted Him close to her heart as long as she lived.
Is there anyone feeling this way this today; are you surrounded by your sins and condemn by them. You feel guilty by the things you’ve done; you think forgiveness and redemption are far away from you. No! You have condemned yourself long enough; there is no sin that is too big that the Lord cannot forgive. The past sins still hold you tight, the ones you cling unto, pulling you down towards the door of destruction.
It is time to do away with them, it is time to go to the throne of mercy and grace and ask for forgiveness. The enemy makes you feel so guilty and makes you think God can never forgive you; he reminds you of how many people you have hurt, many terrible things you have done, he tells you no forgiveness can come to you but that is a big lie.
If you confess and forsake your sin, He is able to forgive you. God sure doesn’t like the things you have done but he still loves you and wants you to come back to him. Stop condemning yourself, stop it! Go before your maker today and He will take the reproach away; He will forgive your sins and heal your heart; he will wash you from every impurity and give you a clean slate. Your sins, he will remember no more. He will take the guilt away.
Written by Abimbola CirclesOfLove.
Read more from www.circlesoflove.co.uk
Picture Credit: VideoBlocks
Once Upon A Time, I wrote this…..
Thinking of one story….
Amanda raced down to the parking lot of the hospital. She got into her car and sat still staring into the thin air. She opened her mouth to speak, but suddenly she had no breath; she gulped for air, but her lungs wouldn’t work.
Her skin was burning and sweats pouring down her body; her head roared like a fire. Then her limbs started to judder.
She was gasping for air. “Oh God…” Some air was getting through now, but not enough to speak. She was feeling nauseous and breathless. Her heart was pounding, seeming to crush her lungs.
She wanted to put her keys into the ignition but her hands were trembling so fast; she was sweating and fighting for more air. She was having a panic attack, but part of her just wanted to die right there. She felt she had no more reason to live.
“No God please…..” She cried out in pain; clutched her hands against her chest.
“Please Lord……,” she was flooded with tears. “I am sorry Lord, I am so sorry….”
Coming out Soon……..
Happy Women’s Day
Happy Women’s Day
Imagine, I have been so busy to even realise it’s women’s day today.
God bless every woman out there.
Quiet me in Your Love
Good morning Folks. Are you at that point where things are not just as you want them to be? This has made you doubt the love of the Father.
Now listen carefully, God loves you this I know. He will not leave you or forsake you. You are not forgotten and He has you in His hands.
Zephaniah 3:17 The LORD your God is in your midst, a mighty one who will save; he will rejoice over you with gladness; he will quiet you by his love; he will exult over you with loud singing.
Did you hear that? The Lord will rejoice over you with gladness and will quiet you by His love.
Go out today believing that He loves you so very much.
Have a great week.